Dawn Bonanno

Read two stories for crit, brainstormed on the parsec story (too many ideas, I need to focus a bit more), and focused on the Hunter edit. I think I managed to nail down Daymar’s involvement with a pretty neat ending. The story’s come a long long way from its first draft.

Edits are coming along, and I found a critique group to join. Fading Light should be ready to post to the group by next week at the latest. My progress posts won’t be daily, as that would be too boring to type (and for you to read) “I edited” six times a week. 🙂 I’m just excited about the crit group at the moment. I know most of the members (online contacts) and I’ve exchanged crits with several of them over the past few years. I’m excited about critiquing their work too. They always had interesting stories in the past, and I’m sure that hasn’t changed.

I slipped away from the writing for a bit, scared off the new novel for some reason. I think I was intimidated by the new characters (which can be fun, challenging, and terrifying all at once!). I need to get the groove back, even if it’s 30 minutes a day. This week, I’m aiming to edit Fading Light, something I know I can do. I’ve got a strange schedule with work, and Mom’s in town, so I anticipate some level of exhaustion, but writing is ON the agenda. SOMETHING every day.

Monday’s lunch break was spent editing Fading Light (1 page).

Tuesday evening’s writing time was spent with the hubby.

Wednesday evening is going to be serious-clean-up-the-house night. Grrr.

The posting silence means Family took over this weekend, and I had neither the energy nor will to write, but I read. I’ve been reading Think Sideways lessons, and I’ve been reading Game of Thrones.

And I’ve been thinking about my outline, trying to fit my bad guy in, but I realize too that I know who my bad guy was up until the point he committed this particular crime, and he’s angry now, losing control, but who is he when he isn’t this criminal? And yes, this is important because he and his victim know each other. Poor Audrey can’t look at this guys and say it’s him because he looks and acts like a criminal. What fun would that be to read? Besides, even criminals have their own lives and schedules and likes and dislikes. It’s not like they live for each moment they commit these crimes. They grocery shop. They go to the mall. They read the newspaper while sipping their coffee. Ooooh.. and there it is. Thanks for the help. 😉

I’m at it again. The project is in conjunction with the writing course (How To Think Sideways) by Holly Lisle. I’m in the planning stages of that suspense novel, and should be able to start writing within the next few weeks. I’ve got a temporary title of “Haven” which could of course, change at my next whim. But it’s something. A thing without a name is empty to me. The wrong name is not as bad, but everything needs a name.

Since I don’t have a lot of time for writing, I decided to focus on just one thing — the writing class. It’s going well, I’m up to lesson five and I’m tweaking concepts I knew and used, but it’s nice to see how far it can go without taking the next ten years to figure it all out myself. The biggest thing I’m learning is how not to kill myself before it matters. I’m leary to discuss actual class details, as Ms. Lisle has worked hard on this course, but suffice to say I’m learning some self control, which may go a long way toward using my writing time more effeciently.

So far I’ve gotten three really cool novel ideas straight from the assignments and can’t wait till the writing can begin. 🙂

So I signed up for Holly Lisle’s How To Think Sideways writing course, and dropped it when time constraints became too much. I’ve picked it up again, and have been working on the course material. I’m working through lessons three and four simultaneously (they work well that way, at least in my head they do), and I’ve got two solid thriller ideas. (Although I can’t decide if thriller or suspence is the right word, I’ll work that out later).

It looks like my brain was ready to start this up again. I just hope I can hold onto it this time!

Life’s been crazed, but I can’t ignore the muse. She’s been quiet, yet I can feel her watching me. And when I picked up a Dean Koontz novel this weekend, the first fun reading I’ve done in a very long time, she grabbed me by the neck. “You can write like this,” she told me, “you just need to make the time.” And before she could strangle me, I promised her a half hour a night.

So I’m going to take another look at Holly’s writing class. I’m also thinking about skipping the short story angle and diving into a novel. Something new, something different. If I’m going to start this off right, different could very well cement me into the committment.

I’m slowly moving back into Sanity thanks to the little one granting me more sleep these days. 🙂 To that end, I’ve made some January goals and gotten started on them.

Originally, my January goal went like this: “My January goal is to get myself and my family on a schedule to allow myself some writing time. Any writing time. “

I’ve specified some items to get done before the end of the month.

* Review coursework completed for my two writing classes
* Identify and reread my priority projects (short stories in progress and editing)
* Resubmit marketable short stories [DONE – Treischan Strength went out today!]

Superwoman, I am not.
Clones, I have not.
Common sense, I do indeed possess.

So I’ll be on break from writing November and December. My health comes first, and my new baby’s too once he shows up. I’ve got my two year old to still spoil for a little while yet, and holiday shopping to handle. The writing is there, and it will still be there when my brain and body recover. I’ll post if anything comes up (like my rejection from Fantasy, and yes I’m sending that one right back out tonight, just have to decide where the next destination is). Otherwise, I’ll see you in January.

Life has taken over, and my completed goals are not what I had hoped for September. Considering however I spent half the month sick, and the other half playing catch-up at work, and I’m making the final preparations in the house for baby #2’s arrival, it’s no wonder my writing has slipped. I knew it would. I planned for it to do so. I’m also planning to not kill myself in October, and to get it back after recovering from childbirth/newborn feedings. 🙂

September Results

• Nighthunter’s Bite – progressed but not complete
• Think Sideways Classes – 2 completed
• Novels – 2 read

October Goals

• Think Sideways Classes: 2
• Adv Fiction (UM): 1
• Reading

I’m allowing my writing to slip to the side, it’s getting to be that time, I think. I’ve had to reprioritize home/family/health stuff, and I’m okay with that. However, I’m not abandoning writing entirely. No, I know better than that. 🙂

First off, I’m focusing on the classes I’ve signed up for. I can do those with short periods of time without a lot of prep before hand. And not having fifty thousand things to do afterward, the material seems to stick better in my mind, and I find myself reflecting back to what the coursework entailed.

Also, I’m reading. I’ve added George R.R. Martin’s “Game of Thrones” to my bookshelf at my husband’s request. We don’t read the same authors, so when he raves about one, I really do need to check it out. I’ve read the prologue, and am intrigued by the characters and how quickly Martin has presented them to me in such distinct identities with only a few pages. I’m going to try and read this one slowly, and absorb what I can.

And finally, I’m focusing on one writing project at a time. Nighthunter’s Bite needs to get written, crappy first draft acceptable. I’ve got images of the chase haunting me, and Maura’s strange power is haunting her, and I’ve got to get her some resolution. She’s been running for two years now, you know. I owe her a rest.

My daily list format worked when I was writing daily. I’ve temporarily dropped my list to a monthly points of what needs my attention. I’m adapting, and that’s good. I know I’ll get my time back in some fashion in the coming months.

September 11, 2001 . . . we all know what happened, we all know people who were affected by it. I am fortunate enough not to have lost anyone that day, but New York is my home. I grew up there, I worked there. I lived and breathed New York until about ten years ago when I moved away, so when that second plane hit and we realized it was intentinal, it made me angry. I felt violated.

Seven years later, our lives have changed enough for us to point back to that fateful day. Seven years later, justice really hasn’t been served, has it? Sure, a few higher-ups have been captured and imprisoned, but what has that accomplished? As Americans, we’re still hated by the people that formed those groups, and while I don’t live in fear that they will take action again, I am saddened that their beliefs are so strict that we cannot live in tolerance of one another.

Such is the allure of science fiction novels that depict a future in which a united Earth goes forth to explore the universe. These problems were resolved, tolerance and unity became the standard, and most people are happy. Life is not science fiction, not will it ever be, not from that angle. But it’s sure nice to daydream about it.

While daydreaming, I will not forget those who lost their lives on September 11th. I will not forget our armed forces who have tried and tried to bring order to the Middle East. I will not forget their families who live without them on a daily basis while tackling the normal challenges of everyday life. I will not hate those who can’t understand sharing and tolerance.

I can hope that change will come, that people will come. I don’t think my generation will be the one to do it. Perhaps my children’s generation. All I can do, beyond hoping, is teach my childen right and wrong, while hopefully, some other woman in the Middle East is teaching her children about right and wrong, about sharing and tolerance, and about the responsibility of change.

I will remember. And my children will learn.

It’s been an interesting week. I’ve been going to bed at 8:30 several nights in a row, which isn’t even enough time to check on laundry progress after the two year old goes nighty-night. I need it, so no complaints. I feel more clear headed, and I’m using my lunches at work for various writing tasks. I’ve been reading, too. In the evenings, I read a bit of Hunting the Hunter before bed, and I’ve also started Neil Gaiman’s American Gods at a doctor’s appointment. The Think-Sideways assignments are waiting for me, but I just haven’t had a spare ten minutes times three or four to work on the freewriting.

Today’s task is to work more on Nighthunter’s Bite. I’d like to complete the story soon, and get back to editing. I’m really in edit-mode which is making the writing difficult. Sunguard needs my attention. Someone’s been hinting to me that it could be more than just a short story, but I need the short story done before I think any further on it. There are two anthologies I think Sunguard will fit fairly well, but deadlines swoop in when the work’s not getting done.

So many things to write and edit, and so little time . . .

There hasn’t been a lot going on writing-wise, but I’ve been busy. Treischan Strength was rejected, and I’ve resubmitted it to an anthology. I signed up for Holly Lisle’s Think Sideways course, which runs a year long, so the child issues that are due to come up soon shouldn’t affect it. And, I read S.L. Viehl’s Omega Games, and am slightly afraid of what she intends for the end of the series. The main character received some advice from a new friend on how to handle her current family issue, which is pretty much an issue that’s run the course of the series. If she follows his advice, the series is going to end on a sad note, and I hope it doesn’t. I can only wait and see, now.

Evenings have been useless for writing, so I’m back to lunch break writing for a few weeks. Progress will be slow, but if there IS any progress, I will be happy!

I’m not going to whine, I’m not going to make excuses. I’m going to understand what’s wrong and deal with it. Unfortunately, what’s wrong with my writing and my writing time is really beyond my control and just requires patience from me to get through it all.

I’ve had the luxury of working a pretty terrific dayjob that allows me thinking time for my writing, usually at the expense of speed getting through my never ending workflow. If I didn’t get enough done before lunch, I’d make it up after lunch. If I didn’t get enough done after lunch, I’d make up for it the next day. Don’t misunderstand – I don’t steal company time to write, it’s just that I’m usually thinking about two different things at once anyway, so why can’t one of them be something I love? 🙂 Having my mind in two places was okay before, but not now. I’m entering the third trimester of my pregnancy, and I cannot play with my workflow anymore. I cannot chance handing my workload over to my co-workers without it being 100% up to date. Totally not fair. So with the super-focus on getting stuff done at work (and taking on -voluntarily- a scanning project that will help those gals while I’m out) means my lunch break writing time is being compromised. I have a hard time switching tracks in my brain from patent workings and data entry to the creative output I need for writing.

Also creating an obstacle is the combination of my two year old needing a later bedtime and my own need for an earlier bedtime, shrinking that precious time to a mere hour to an hour and a half, which needs to be divded between writing, household stuff, and oh I don’t know, ME time? It took us a few days of fighting the 7 – 7:30 bedtime routine for the little girl, and she wouldn’t actually go to sleep until 8 or after. We pushed that up, so our routine with her starts at 7:20/30 (playing, reading with her in her room, singing bedtime songs) and ends quite smoothly by 8pm. Sound asleep, she’s freed me to do my own thing.

Which means finishing up the dinner cleanup, putting away whatever toys we never got her to do, dealing with the day’s mail, starting a load of laundry, and then am I free to write. Or try, anyway. My bedtime has dropped to between 9 and 10pm, mostly because of the Nighttime Joys of pregnancy (leg cramps, bathroom needs), I’m only getting an hour and a half to two hours of sleep at a time. Between that 10pm and 6am, I’m up and out of bed at least 3 times every night.

So faced with all this, my creative energy is dwindling. My time available to stir up that energy is fading, right along with my desire to put out stories. It’s the sleep, it’s the strain on my body, it’s the demands of keeping my day job going strong. Heck, even sitting at the computer is getting more difficult with the big baby belly in the way.

I’m dropping my weekly goals to one item from here on out, which will be geared toward completing projects, but focused more on paying any level of attention to the writing. Reading is included in that, especially if it’s my own. Marking up manuscripts now for editing later might work. My monthly goals are going to change, and I don’t think I’m going to make my submission goals for the year. And considering the baby is due the end of November (and will likely show up via c-section), my recovery and his well being are going to take precedence over the writing. Not to mention, my computer room is in the basement of my house and stairs after a c-section are quite limited, I won’t even be at my computer all that much.

I knew this was coming, and it still makes me sad. I feared with my first pregnancy that I’d forget how to write, and while some things needed practice to get back into, my muse was still there. I just had to rework some of the technicalities of the writing. I can do it again. I just didn’t want to give it up this soon. Comparing again with my last pregnancy, I wrote a little bit, but gave up very early on. This time, I wrote nearly every week right through week 26 (that’s about 6.5 months). So really, I did better. I’m glad for that.

I’ll just have to take it one little bit at a time from here on out.